I ran the half marathon race of the 2012 Dallas Marathon on Sunday, December 9, 2012. This was the second time I have run the half marathon of this event (the first was in in 2009) and in 2010 I ran the full marathon (my first!). Prior to that I ran part of the full course as a member of a 5-person marathon relay team three years in a row. Also, since I am a member of the Board of Directors for the Dallas Marathon and I spend several hours each month attending planning meetings for the marathon weekend's events, this race has more significance than any other event for me.
I was so excited to run this year, particularly because the Dallas Marathon underwent significant changes (including a new course design) and I was eager to see how the changes would improve the event. I was also excited about the race because it would be my fist distance event since the Cowtown Marathon in February of this year. After recovering from a foot summer injury and just getting back into running in early fall, this would be my first endurance test in a race setting.
So how did I do? Not too well, unfortunately. My time was lackluster according to the expectations I had for myself. I went into the race thinking that I would be happy with 1:52 and really thrilled with 1:50, but I ended up with 1:56 (my Garmin time for 13.1 miles) or 1:57 (official chip time per the race, with my Garmin saying that was for 13.21 miles). I know that by many standards this is still a good time and underneath my emotions I realize that I should be proud of my effort, but this was 8-10 minutes greater than the time I spent running the last three or four half marathons that I completed over the last two years (with the exception of last year's poor race). On the other hand, this was a hard race for me physically, likely influenced by the near 70 degree temperatures at the start and nearly 100% humidity and gusty winds. After a day of reflection I am feeling somewhat better about the time component, and the soreness I felt in my quads on Monday reminded me that I did well by finishing the event and working as hard as I did.
But what killed me - and why I am venting through writing this post - was that I let myself get defeated mentally - AGAIN (!!). This happened with a half marathon last fall when I was disappointed for letting the difficulties of the race get to me. I *thought* I was determined not to let it happen again in a race setting. But my mind wasn't strong enough on Sunday and I ended giving into my tiredness beginning around mile 9. At that point I told myself I could walk through a few water stops, but then around mile 10 I let myself walk for 20 seconds or so, which turned into several more walking breaks between that point and the finish. I even walked for a few seconds in the middle of mile 12 when the finish line was in sight. Geez.
Other than the suboptimal race conditions and the fact that I haven't raced much this year, I don't know what went wrong for my mental state to not hold out. I felt like my training went well enough, though in retrospect I wonder if maybe I got too lazy with it. I used to follow training plans religiously for each half marathon race, but since running the two full marathons I have felt mentally OK with training and have loosely let myself run what I remember the old training plans used to look like. This time around I consistently ran 22-28 mile weeks (probably a bit on the low side) for the past 8 weeks or so and combined speed work with decent, increasing mileage long runs each week. I cross-trained two days a week and never felt any pain in my legs or feet. I ran a 10 miler on the treadmill at an average 8:30 pace two weeks ago, which should have been a good indication of my preparation for Sunday. And secretly I was quite proud of my effort at the Thanksgiving Day Turkey Trot, a 10K that I ran in 49:02 (8:00 pace, placed seventh in my age group!). I ran that race beautifully, with negative splits and the last three miles all under 8:00 minute/mile pace.
Two suboptimal half marathons within a year's time tells me that I need to change something up with my training if I want to get better or at least maintain the same conditioning that I felt good about two years ago. I am considering either more base training with less speed work (I got a little speed work happy in the past month, sometimes preferring fast shorter distance runs than longer mid-week runs) and maybe cutting back a little on the treadmill. I read an article in a running magazine the afternoon after I had finished the race about the importance of base training during times when you are not actively training for an event, and it made me think that I have never really done that before. I probably could use some hill work too as I never practice changing elevation except when it naturally occurs, which you have to work hard to find in Dallas. And maybe the treadmill runs have left me feeling overconfident because they don't mimic the outdoors conditions of a race.
But I am determined to bounce back and feel good after a race for a change. I need to run for the energy and mood boost it gives me, plus it keeps me feeling healthy. I have my eyes set to try and run the half marathon of the Cowtown this year, which is in February. Cross your fingers and say a prayer that I get my race mojo back!
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Ugh. I hate when I finish a race (or even just a run!) knowing I could have done better or that I gave up. It's frustrating! Do you feel burned out on running, like you need a small break?
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